Toddler fighting for independence

Babe at West Town Farms Spring Event and Easter Egg Hunt

Babe (now  two years and four months) goes through moments where she really wants the independence to do things herself. Sadly her capabilities often don’t match her independence expectations, which after some time (while I’m usually giggling away not so silently to myself or gouging my eyes out with frustration because she won’t let me help), a tantrum breaks out.

During these moments I (largely) feel genuine sympathy. Even now in my thirties I can remember feeling this very same way when I was a child. If I confess maybe there are times in my adult life I’ve felt the same and sometimes thrown things across the room and yelled at myself.

So I try to be sympathetic and help in the arms reach way she wants. But buckling herself into the car seat is not one of those times any parent is going to stand back.

You tried buckling a child into a car seat that doesn’t want to go in or wants to do it themselves?
They are stronger and more fierce than they look. I’m just glad I haven’t got a strong boy to contend with. My little girl can put up a fine fight when she wants too though!

Saturday was a fine example
Getting back into the car to leave the local chinese takeaway. I was allowed to open the car door for her to climb in, in the opposite side to where the seat is located I should add (oo the contrary miss), then ordered to shut the door. Yes ordered, if you can tell me that you aren’t ordered around by your toddler sometimes (just occasionally perhaps?) I think you must either be called Helga or Mrs Iron Heart. Or your toddler is really a robot trained to say please and thankyou, not speak unless they are spoken to and always looks pristine. But I know you’re not like that and your toddler has ‘I’m a terror’ written under his or hers scalp like everyone else’s 🙂

Back to me standing outside the car with chinese going cold in hand, looking somewhat impatient and hungry. Babe had got into the seat and I knew the straps where going to be an issue, if I waited five mins she might have solved that before a tantrum, but the buckle was bound to throw her over the edge anyway. So I cut my losses and waded in, wrestling mama to the battle lines. After the slaps and pinches that she threw my way, we drove part way home in silence while she had a ‘naughty moment’. I had no naughty step or naughty corner available, so a naughty moment had to do. She duly apologised after her two minutes and we got on with singing and dancing along to the radio while talking of yummy chicken balls and noodles….and spotting motor bikes. Babe loves motorbikes for some reason. My sister will be proud.

I’m hoping she learns sooner rather than later to cut herself some slack and get some much-needed patience too!


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